This photo is from a film by Nicolas Roeg and Donald Cammell made in 1968 called Performance. My ambivalent relationship to the film–a psychedelic British crime drama starring Mick Jagger and Anita Pallenberg–is indicative of a general inclination i tend to have to like things that don’t completely match up to who i am (who i imagine i am)–a pattern with which maybe this blog initially attempted to trace until it inevitably found other curiosities, attachments, and demons upon which to ruminate. I began writing here as an academic with a guilty pleasure for trashier things. Now I’m a floral designer who has never dropped the preoccupations that landed me in academia to begin with: nostalgia, performance, desire.